Tag Archives: suicide

Butter by Erin Jade Lange

9634267

What if the only way you could win popularity was by killing yourself?

This is “Butter’s” dilemma. As a morbidly obese teen in a high school full of jocks and Barbie-wannabe’s, he is worse than unpopular. He’s invisible.

All 430 pounds of him.

So when he decides to kill himself, he wants to go out with a bang. Inspired by a hateful blog comment about him, he makes a website called www.butterslastmeal.com . Fine, everyone thinks he’s a fat slob. He’ll show them. New Year’s Eve, he’s going to eat himself to death live on webcam.

So when his website garners him TONS of popularity around school, instead of mortification he feels good. Finally he’s getting noticed. Finally he has friends. So why does life have to be so sweet right now, at the very end?

This book was awesome and it’s so socially relavant I could weep. It addresses bullying and the wide range of feelings that come with it–good and bad. It’s interesting to understand that even though Butter was “popular” it was for all the wrong reasons, and his “friends” were really cheering on his death. That’s some crazy shit.

It sounds so cliche, but I loved Butter’s personality. I’m glad that he got mad and I’m glad that he fought back. His love interest, Anna, was a dumb little twit, and you could see him starting to realize that in little glimmers throughout the book. There was nothing to admire about her except her beauty.

I personally have never had to struggle with my weight, and for that I feel blessed. I can’t grasp what it’s like to use food as an emotional crutch, and maybe that’s why I’m so intensely interested in hearing people’s weight loss stories. To view food as a comfort mechanism is foreign to me, but a blight on so many others.

But Butter reminds us that no one is too far gone to be helped, and first and foremost you must love yourself–big or small.

4 sticks of butter of 5

Advertisements

St. Michael’s Scales by Neil O. Connelly

St. Michael’s Scales was a very strange piece of fiction.

The protagonist Keegan Flannery was born one-half of a set of twins. The other–his brother–Michael, died at birth. After his mother is committed to a mental hospital and his older brother runs away from home, Keegan is left with two brothers who ignore him and a father who doesn’t remember he exists. The only attention he gets at school is negative because of his extremely small stature. When he realizes that his father has been telling people his mother is dead rather than face the embarrassment of owning up to the facts–Keegan begins having dreams of his dead twin. All at once, he knows how to right the wrong done to his family.

He must kill himself before his 16th birthday.

But when a fluke absence allows him a spot as a featherweight on his high school’s wrestling team, things begin to change. Not only is he dreaming of his brother Michael, now he is beginning to hallucinate fighting with him. He knows that Michael was the brother that should have lived, and the thought haunts him every day.

Being raised Catholic, knowing that suicide is a mortal sin…will Keegan go through with his plan to kill himself, or has wrestling given him something to live for?

SMS was a very weird novel. It reminded me of A Prayer for Owen Meany, not only because of the religious aspects but also because Keegan and Owen both fit the same physical description. They also both had a mission they were planning on carrying out, and both knew that it would lead to their untimely demise.

I never truly felt attached to Keegan, and while I felt sympathy for his family situation, I didn’t understand why or how he thought his suicide would rectify the tribulations his family had gone through. Also, with a history of mental illness in his family, he should’ve begun to realize that he wasn’t in his right mind when he began to see visions of his brother. Rather than him viewing his dead twin as some sort of spiritual guardian, he viewed him as a malevolent force to be reckoned with.

All the blame for those feelings should be placed solely on his parents shoulders, especially his father’s for ignoring him.  AND not only did his mother always get a dually-named cake–she also would force Keegan to pick out one of his presents and bring in to the cemetery each year on his birthday. It’s understandable to want to remember a dead child and keep him a part of the family, but not to the detriment of the living children. No wonder Keegan felt he played second fiddle.

I wasn’t a fan of this book, and I would not recommend it.

2 wrong-hearted Jesus of 5


Three Posts for the Price of One! Happy New Year!

That’s right, kiddos, I’m going to do something a bit out of the ordinary and talk about three books today. I’ve been super busy graduating (read: dream come true) combined with working retail during the holidays (translation: nightmare). Plus, I just got back from a spectacular road trip to Baltimore with a pit stop in Savannah (love it, go there). Needless to say I’m doing a bit of catch up.

 

 

So here it goes…

I finished Snuff by Chuck Palahniuk a while back, and as if we didn’t already know it: what a crazy bastard! It talks about an aging porn star who intends to go out with a bang (literally) by attempting the largest gang bang in history. 600 guys in one go. Ew. The cast of men include a balding washed-up tv actor, an old porn co-star, and a boy who claims to be her long lost son. Weird.

This book was recommended to me by my co-workers, who are all as messed up as I am and love this horrible stuff. I loved Fight Club so I was interested in trying some of his other work. When I found out the topic, I was grotesquely interested but I almost felt like I didn’t want people to catch me reading it. I have to say I was a bit disappointed. The whole story seemed to be much ado about nothing, and the ending was strange/unexpected/gross/crest-fallen. It was confusing to keep the men straight at first, since they were all referred to by number and not name. I also hated how Sheila kept referring to them as pud-pullers, tally whackers, and all other manner of weird slang terms. I feel let down by this work…

The second book is Modelland by Tyra Banks. I will sum this up quickly. DON’T EVER, I REPEAT, EVER READ THIS. It sucked so royally it wasn’t even funny. Wow. I mean…. Just wow. Tyra Banks cannot write, even a little. It was really, really sad actually. I used to watch her show when I was a teenager and I think she’s a beautiful woman, but dang… Epic fail. I cannot even begin to describe how ridiculous the whole story was, so I’ll just tell you to avoid it and hope you take my word for it. It was so atrocious it took me a month to read it. Avoid at all costs.

And last but not least was Beautiful by Amy Reed. Her story told the tale of middle-schooler Cassie, whom upon becoming newly beautiful and moving to a new school, quickly spirals into a world full of sex, drugs, and suicide. Typical teenage angst, but it did have a gritty flavor that I appreciated. I feel like many of Cassie’s friend’s personalities fell flat though. I never really cared about Sarah or felt afraid of Alex and an author’s main job is to make you sympathize with the character and immerse yourself in his/her world. Also, the whole drug thing was really glamorized because I don’t know any middle school girl first experimenting with drugs who could pound coke and pot and alcohol down like she could. Kinda unrealistic, but it was a quick read and I did enjoy it. It’s a bath tub book for sure.

Bottom line:

Snuff: 3 of 5 stars

Modelland: 1 of 5 stars

Beautiful: 3 of 5 stars

Nothing too impressive out the bunch. Keep calm, and read on.